A Loss to Our Family

I don’t have a 34 week update for you guys. In all truth, my 34th week of pregnancy was just a blur of emotion as we suddenly lost my beautiful Grandmother on New Year’s Day and laid her to rest the following Friday. It was a rough week. I woke up every morning thinking it was a terrible dream and the reality sunk in and most of my days were spent getting overwhelmed and so terribly upset. I think it was more difficult because the visitations were held in the evening during the week and although we were still on Christmas holidays, it would have been difficult for us to drive there for the evening (about 2.5 hrs away).

2018 was going to be one of the best years for my Grandma. She was so excited for this. It will be her first Grandchild and she wanted us to call her GG (for Great Grandma) after he/she was born. My Mom told me that when she went to visit a few days before my Grandma passed away, she kept asking if my Mom knew if it was a boy or a girl. I know she totally knows who this baby is now and I have no doubt in my mind that she is keeping us safe and adding the finishing touches to baby from the other side. My cousin is also getting married this year and I have heard that she was planning on what she was going to wear for her wedding a few days before she left us. A pantsuit. I think she wanted it to be sparkly. She would have looked absolutely stunning. 

My Grandma was laid to rest in the beautiful gown she had worn to my wedding. She had everything planned for her funeral – right down to the music selection for the mass (which absolutely devastated me while we walked behind her casket; I am thankful for my sister and cousin who walked beside me). 

Grandma, 2018 will not be the same without you. I still can’t believe you’re gone. I will miss celebrating these wonderful life events coming up this year and my heart will forever long to have a picture of you holding our baby. I know you are watching over us always and you have the greatest view of this year from where you are. 

Forever in our hearts. Love you GG. 

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